You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
