she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
There r osticjed everywhere
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize