Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Randomize
