dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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