i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
It all started with a game of naked twister.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
