And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
