Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
