my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize