I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
