Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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