This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
vagina is talking i cant
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
