yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
