i barfeds in our rink
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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