How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize