Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
high people should be assigned attendants
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
