he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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