I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
