People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
