why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
