Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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