Kiss
Puke
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
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