You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize