Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Randomize