whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Randomize
