just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
