Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen

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(310): View more from California

I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...

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(716): View more from New York

just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.

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(406): View more from Montana

A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.

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(319): View more from Iowa

I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!

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