I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Randomize
