i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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