I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
