OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
