How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
