I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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