Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
