dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
