I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
high people should be assigned attendants
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Randomize
