I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize