I can feel you judging me through the phone.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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