trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
