okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
