I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize
