what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Duck Duck Cougar?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
