Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Someone signed my nipple.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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