Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
