oh god the rape fog is back!
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Randomize
