"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
