I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
how does that bad decision feel?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
