we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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