im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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