White coat. Heels.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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