the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
