He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
