idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
